Terence is a very dear friend and a very hot advertising creative. ‘Ad Verbatim’ is written by him.

Basically, I mean, nice, you know, of course, sure. Did we mention basically ?

Careful now, we’re on slippery ground here. Resist the urge to choke on your own conscience and watch diplomacy work up a lather on the twin cheeks of confusion. If you’re wondering where to park yourself, check out the fence. Standard edition comes custom-built with bells and bucket seats attached. The new ones have cute little blinkers in the sleeve just in case you forget to bring your own. The higher up you go, the better the fences get – this one’s top of the line with cushions, a hookah and a potion that helps you vaguely regurgitate what anyone just said. Smile, nod and twitch the occasional eyebrow. Ask pointless questions. Point out the obvious. And let the sudden interest in your cuticles obfuscate all desire to think. To egg you on in the circumlocutory excursion, you have the infallible alibi of an agenda. Riddled with double-speak and whine, it’s the chiropractic cure for the spineless. Learn to read it with an intellectual squint and you’ll see happy gaussian blurry sense oozing blissfully out of every word spoken thereafter. Bask in the oblivion of it all and wallow warthog-like in the didactic choler of it all. The point is meant to stay missing and don’t you send sniffer dogs after it. The onus is one word you aren’t meant to split into two. Should you per chance make the glorious mistake of straying anywhere near the point, spill your coffee, fiddle with the airconditioning or better still, lick the window panes. Your apology will be promptly accepted and everyone can safely return to the random minutes of communal nostril-mining without further ado.

Think tank meetings are mapped out ever so cheerfully. Just as long as you end up doing what has been always been done, you’re ok, they’re ok and the dude that serves you tea is ok. Being ok is about having been there before. Dangle your tootsies from the fence and look around you – haven’t you been here before?

But no, you’re a free radical perfecting a backstroke in a cesspool of whys. And you want to know where point B is. Must you? Well okay then, who am I the irreverent fly to question the otherwise?

So how does one make things happen? I notice you haven’t opted for the fence, that’s a good start. If watching things happening is passe’, make sure wondering what happened is not an option. A spade is not a heart so stop using it to think. The jokers you’ve been dealt need to be shuffled into their senses with simple straight talk. No minced words, faked perceptions and certainly no basicallies. Simplify the statement. Question the prerogative. Challenge convention. Encourage the unique. Make it relevant and compel a definitive decision. Visionaries are an isolated lot when they don’t push hard enough to share what they see. You’ll find yourself neck-deep in the quagmire of uncertainty and the only way out is to pull the rest in. Responsibility isn’t a walk in the park. And only conservatives live on its benches. If you want to make it back to your desk with half your mind intact, stir up that storm today. Complacence kills ones own motives. Tunnel-vision is a motive in itself. Together they roger the agenda. Don’t wait for someone else to mop up the mess, unclog the drainpipes or fix the floorboards. And when you do, don’t claim martyrdom. You’re there already.