Facebook Facts

[redpaw]

Facebook has taken over our world by storm and how! Nowadays, the day starts with updating our status message's and profile picture and getting passively in touch with our friends. Welcome to the world for internet I guess. But hey I'm not complaining at all... we need to be with the new age and if Facebook is the new age call then be it so

Some facts about our addiction below. Have fun

Facebook is the world’s largest social network, with over 350 million users.It was founded by Mark Zuckerberg in February 2004, initially as an exclusive network for Harvard students. It was a huge hit: in 2 weeks, half of the schools in the Boston area began demanding a Facebook network. Zuckerberg immediately recruited his friends Dustin Moskowitz and Chris Hughes to help build Facebook, and within four months, Facebook added 30 more college networks.
The original idea for the term Facebook came from Zuckerberg’s high school (Phillips Exeter Academy). The Exeter Face Book was passed around to every student as a way for students to get to know their classmates for the following year. It was a physical paper book until Zuckerberg brought it to the internet.
With this success, Zuckerberg, Moskowitz and Hughes moved out to Palo Alto for the summer and rented a sublet. A few weeks later, Zuckerberg ran into the former cofounder of Napster, Sean Parker. Parker soon moved in to Zuckerberg’s apartment and they began working together. Parker provided the introduction to their first investor, Peter Thiel, cofounder of PayPal and managing partner of The Founders Fund. Thiel invested $500,000 into Facebook.
With millions more users, Friendster attempted to acquire the company for $10 million in mid 2004. Facebook turned down the offer and subsequently received $12.7 million in funding from Accel Partners, at a valuation of around $100 million. Facebook continued to grow, opening up to high school students in September 2005 and adding an immensely popular photo sharing feature the next month. The next spring, Facebook received $25 million in funding from Greylock Partners and Meritech Capital, as well as previous investors Accel Partners and Peter Thiel. The pre-money valuation for this deal was about $525 million. Facebook subsequently opened up to work networks, eventually amassing over 20,000 work networks. Finally in September 2006, Facebook opened to anyone with an email address.
In the summer of 2006, Yahoo attempted to acquire the company for $1 billion dollars. Reports actually indicated that Zuckerberg made a verbal agreement to sell Facebook to Yahoo. A few days later when Yahoo’s stock price took a dive, the offer was lowered to $800 million and Zuckerberg walked away from the deal. Yahoo later offered $1 billion again, this time Zuckerberg turned Yahoo down and earned instant notoriety as the “kid” who turned down a billion. This was not the first time Zuckerberg turned down an acquisition offer; Viacom had previously unsuccessfully attempted to acquire the company for $750 million in March, 2006.
One sour note for Facebook has been the controversy with social network ConnectU. The founders of ConnectU, former classmates of Mark Zuckerberg at Harvard, allege that Zuckerberg stole their original source code for Facebook. The ordeal has gone to court, and has now been resolved.
Notwithstanding this lingering controversy, Facebook’s growth in the fall of 2007 was staggering. Over 1 million new users signed up every week, 200,000 daily, totaling over 50 million active users. Facebook received 40 billion page views a month. Long gone were the days of Facebook as a social network for college students. 11% of users are over the age of 35, and the fastest growing demographic is users over 30. Facebook has also seen huge growth internationally; 15% of the user base is in Canada. Facebook users’ passion, or addiction, to the site is unparalleled: more than half use the product every single day and users spend an average of 19 minutes a day on Facebook. Facebook is 6th most trafficked site in the US and top photo sharing site with 4.1 billion photos uploaded.
Based on these types of numbers, Microsoft invested $240 million into Facebook for 1.6 percent of the company in October 2007. This meant a valuation of over $15 billion, making Facebook the 5th most valuable US Internet company, yet with only $150 million in annual revenue. Many explained Microsoft’s decision as being solely driven by the desire to outbid Google.
Facebook’s competitors include MySpace, Bebo, Friendster, LinkedIn, Tagged, Hi5, Piczo, Open Socialc and now Orkut in India.

How Facebook.com is ranked around the world:
1 Indonesia
1 Philippines
1 Malaysia
1 Singapore
2 United States
2 France
2 Italy
2 United Kingdom
2 Canada
2 Turkey
2 Australia
2 Argentina
2 South Africa
2 Venezuela
2 Colombia
2 Belgium
2 Greece
2 Egypt
2 Hong Kong
2 Sweden
2 Chile
2 Bangladesh
2 Austria
2 Switzerland
2 Norway
2 Czech Republic
3 Pakistan
3 Taiwan
4 India
4 Spain
4 Mexico
4 Thailand
5 Germany
5 Saudi Arabia
38 Japan

Facebook.com users come from these countries:
29.7% United States
5.1% France
4.8% Italy
4.8% United Kingdom
4.2% India

Where people go on Facebook.com:
85.4% facebook.com
7.6% apps.facebook.com
4.7% new.facebook.com
0.4% es-la.facebook.com
0.4% en-gb.facebook.com

Average Load Time for Facebook.com
Very Fast (0.118 Seconds), 99% of sites are slower.


Below data taken from peronal blog of nick burcher. You can catch him at http://www.nickburcher.com/

Latest Facebook usage statistics by country - 12 months of extraordinary global growth
UPDATE: Facebook usage statistics by country - December 09 here!


- On 1st July 2008, Facebook were reporting 82,451,680 active users, Facebook figures now show that Facebook has 233,864,820 global users.

- Facebook growth has come everywhere. USA Facebook users have increased by 41,567,420, but Facebook has also seen a growth rate of 3000% in Indonesia!

- In July 2008 11 countries had more than 1 million Facebook users, now 33 countries have more than 1 million Facebook users.

- Explosion in Facebook users numbers was seen in Western Europe (France, Spain etc) and South America (eg Chile) in the second half of 2008 (though numbers are still growing).

- More recently the fastest growing Facebook markets have been in Eastern Europe (eg Czech Republic), the Far East (Indonesia etc) and, significantly for Orkut, Brazil and India

Here are the Top 20 countries with highest number of Facebook users (2nd July 2009 - data from Facebook):

• Rank Country Number of Facebook users 12 month growth % 6 month growth %
  1 USA 69,378,980 149.5% 64.9%
  2 UK 18,711,160 67.5% 25.3%
  3 Turkey 12,382,320 257.4% 56.1%
  4 Canada 11,961,020 24.3% 10.1%
  5 France 10,781,480 338.1% 63.7%
  6 Italy 10,218,400 1980.7% 82.9%
  7 Indonesia 6,496,960 2997.3% 624.3%
  8 Australia 6,053,560 88.2% 39.8%
  9 Spain 5,773,200 729.6% 122.3%
  10 Colombia 5,760,300 138.8% 58.6%
  11 Argentina 4,906,220 1073.8% 117.5%
  12 Chile 4,830,680 129.4% 16.3%
  13 Mexico 3,644,400 249.5% 153%
  14 Venezuela 3,578,740 270.2% 91%
  15 India 3,236,140 354.8% 202.1%
  16 Germany 3,136,680 407.5% 149.9%
  17 Philippines 2,719,560 1572.1% 596.1%
  18 Belgium 2,372,460 346.2% 43.3%
  19 Sweden 2,287,240 100.3% 34.8%
  20 Hong Kong 2,087,580 149.1% 43.1%

[*figures are taken from Facebook and then compared to Facebook usage statistics lists that I have previously compiled (allowing the 6 month and 12 month comparisons.)]


Top 30 Facebook Fan Pages - Jan 2010
Facebook Fan Pages are still increasing in popularity. At the end of 2008 only Barack Obama and Michael Phelps had more than 1 million fans. As you can see from the list below, the numbers have increased significantly - and Vin Diesel is now more popular than Barack Obama!

Here are the top 30 Facebook Fan Pages by number of fans (including URL):

Rank Facebook Fan Page Name Number of Facebook Fans Facebook Fan Page URL

1 Michael Jackson 10,551,163 http://www.facebook.com/michaeljackson
2 Vin Diesel 7,232,745 http://www.facebook.com/VinDiesel
3 Barack Obama 7,095,229 http://www.facebook.com/barackobama
4 Facebook 6,662,703 http://www.facebook.com/facebook
5 Mafia Wars 6,426,482 http://www.facebook.com/MafiaWarsFans
6 Texas Hold'em Poker 5,848,694 http://www.facebook.com/TexasHoldEm
7 Megan Fox 5,357,269 http://www.facebook.com/MeganFox
8 Starbucks 5,331,423 http://www.facebook.com/Starbucks
9 Lady Gaga 4,711,581 http://www.facebook.com/ladygaga
10 RIP Michael Jackson (We Miss You) 4,695,522 http://www.facebook.com/pages/RIP-Michael-
Jackson-We-Miss-You/132749984408
11 I love Sleep 4,682,956 http://www.facebook.com/pages/I-SLEEP
/73330003836
12 Pizza 4,643,720 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Pizza/44258313195
13 Twilight 4,631,460 http://www.facebook.com/twilight
14 Will Smith 4,611,952 http://www.facebook.com/WillSmith
15 Dr. House 4,531,231 http://www.facebook.com/DrHouse
16 I need a vacation!!! 4,385,918 http://www.facebook.com/pages/I-need-a-vacation
/72161599412
17 Coca-Cola 4,103,026 http://www.facebook.com/coca-cola
18 I really hate slow computers 4,016,919 http://www.facebook.com/pages/I-really-hate-slow-
computers/88390832382
19 YouTube 3,885,861 http://www.facebook.com/youtube
20 I hate waking up during a good
dream and it won't come back! 3,835,373 http://www.facebook.com/pages/I-hate- waking-
up-during-a-good-dream-and-it-wont-come-
back/106867375015
21 Adam Sandler 3,746,593 http://www.facebook.com/Sandler
22 I don't get enough sleep because
I stay up late for no reason 3,170,874 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Sleepville/I-dont-
sleep-enough-because-I-stay-up-late-for-no-
reason/88901432776
23 Skittles 3,555,983 http://www.facebook.com/skittles
24 Linkin Park 3,537,072 http://www.facebook.com/linkinPark
25 Nutella 3,421,754 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Nutella
/24932281961
26 Freeze Pops 3,379,178 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Freeze-
Pops/77257732630
27 Randomely laughing because you
remembered something funny 3,331,980 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Randomely-
laughing-because-you-remembered-something-
funny/92516322212
28 Random laughter when remembering
something 3,326,008 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Laugh-
City/Random-laughter-when-remembering-
something/109759232094
29 Selena Gomez 3,315,239 http://www.facebook.com/Selena
30 Pizza 3,306,364 http://www.facebook.com/pages/Pizza
/27041826093

Top 30 Facebook Fan Pages by number of fans (figures taken from Facebook)


Updated: Facebook Usage In India Grows As Orkut Misses A Trick
Update: Facebook has since launched a developer contest focused on Indian developers (via @nikhil_kumar). The prizes: $4000, $2000 and $1000 in each of the two categories – Facebook Apps, and Facebook Connect Integrations.
The second category is particular interest: Facebook is pushing for people to integrate Facebook Connect with their websites (or blogs). Facebook Connect allows users to comment with their Facebook IDs, and ends up helping Facebook promote itself as a unique online identifier – similar to a Google Profile and OpenID. Haven’t seen Google do the same with Google Friend Connect, which, incidentally, has little to do with Orkut. Looks like Orkut has some strategizing to do.
Original Post (July 2 2009, 6.23 AM): Did Google owned Orkut miss a trick in India, by not partnering with more Indian companies? Inside Facebook reports, basing their findings from Facebook’s advertiser tools, that the social network saw a significant increase in the number of active users to almost 3.2 million over the last 60 days:

Inside Facebook has reported a similar trend for Brazil, another country where Orkut is the dominant social network. We’ve noticed a significant increase in activity from Facebook in India over the last few months, which co-incides with the increase in the audience growth depicted in the chart. Key among them is the amount of airtime that it has received as a part of an advertisement for Aircels “Pocket Internet” service. Aircel has focused on value added services like Mobile Internet for its launches in Delhi and Mumbai, and both Facebook and Yahoo Onesearch have received TV airtime as a consequence of this. One of the famous ZooZoo’s commercials from Vodafone in India also promoted Facebook.
Apart from this, Facebook has actively partnered with Indian companies -particularly mobile operators – and inked deals with Internet companies around key events like the Oscars and the Indian Parliamentary Elections:

Feb 2009: Partnership with Zoom TV and World TV for the Oscars in India. From what we’ve heard, there was a partnership with NDTV for the same, but that is unconfirmed.
April 2009:
– Goes mobile in India for SMS Alerts with Tata Indicom
– Partners with Aircel for Voice Message Application, allowing users to leave voice messages on Facebook, according to this forum post of a press release. (note: unconfirmed)
– Facebook promoted in a Zoozoo’s commercial by Vodafone (view the commercial)
May 2009
– Launches Indian language interface
– Partners with Nautanki.tv for coverage of the Indian Elections
– Promoted in India by Aircel as a part of their Pocket Internet Service, particularly during the Indian Premier League, a key Cricket event. (view the commercial)
From what we’ve heard, there’s something planned around the Union Budget in India as well.
This is not merely a two-way fight though – Twitter’s slowly gaining in prominence with several media companies also adopting Twitter for promotion of their content; recently, all of UTVi’s anchors joined Twitter, and they regularly mention their Twitter IDs on the channel. MIH (Naspers) and Tencent owned Ibibo has also regularly partnered with media companies for cross-media promotion.
We haven’t heard much about Orkut of late, apart from the launch of a mobile application, and the launch of advertiser tools; in terms of partnerships, one of the few that we are aware of is with MTV India for their popular Roadies show.
Compared to Facebooks claim of 3.2 million active users, Orkut claims 13 million – it does appear to have the largest base among social networks in India, but certainly shouldn’t get complacent. That said, while usage is one thing, monetization of social networks is another story.

[Anjana Kamat]

and then there are the downsides of facebook which i totally agree with:

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according to the chicago tribune:
Never mind the perils of cyber-stalking, cyber-bullying and posting photos that could endanger your future job prospects: Facebook could be ruining your relationship and driving you toward compulsively jealous behavior.
Social psychologists from the University of Guelph in Canada queried college students who were in romantic relationships about their Facebook use. Their preliminary findings, described in the journal CyberPsychology & Behavior, suggest that rather than enhancing communication between romantic partners, Facebook use may be fueling wild flights of jealous investigation, as users in relationships perceive hints of potential infidelity and then scramble to find evidence of a partner's unfaithful thoughts or behavior.
Invariably, it seems, they end up feeling more jealous.
And where does this lead? For some participants in the study, these investigations led to searching behavior they described as "addictive." And the bouts of escalating jealousy, say the researchers, cannot be good for a relationship.
While the survey was of college students, the researchers surmised that Facebook might unleash the same dynamics in adult relationships. Certainly, they noted, it's worth further research.
The research team responsible for the latest survey has previously found that young adults' need for popularity led them to disclose far more personal information on Facebook than they would reveal in the course of ordinary social contact.

someone else gives 10 reasons why facebook is for losers:

1) Facebook specializes in bringing people together with their former classmates

I hated high school, so why would I be interested in seeing what "nobody I was ever friends" with is doing now. Most of the people on Facebook look like losers now, so what is the point?

Further, I think I am still friends with one person from college. Again, why in the world would I want to dig around on Facebook and see what people from college, whom I was never friends with, are up to now?

2) Facebook's interface sucks


Why?

If I join MyBlogLog or LinkedIn, I can find all kinds of people and websites from the "get go". I don't have to join, I can just start searching.

Go to Facebook.com. "Its Free, anyone can join". Nothing else to see. Yes, you can go to the Find Friends and search by a topic or even drill through names, but that's it. You can see a picture, but if you want to know anything else, you have to join.

To compare, go to Linkedin. Go to the bottom of the page. Enter in a name and bingo, you have the full profile of the person you are looking for, even if you are not a member or logged in.

3) The Wall

Who gives a rat's butt what you are doing today or this minute? People write the dumbest things like "I am using the bathroom" or "just changed the baby's diaper".

Now thing about it, what kind of person finishes an activity and quickly runs to their computer and puts a post on their Wall? L-O-S-E-R, that's who.

4) Facebook is a time waster.

A friend revealed to me today, she spends 1-2 hours A DAY on facebook. Some of it is spent looking up old friends (losers from high school). But most of her time is spent trying to sound more interesting than the other people on her friends list.

So she makes up stuff to put on her wall like, "just finished reading Obamas book" or "Tutoring the baby in French while listening to Mozart". And she it not alone. I read lots of nonsense like this on people's walls like "working on my spiritual drumming", "finding my inner self", etc...

Its all made up. Losers just post what ever they think their little group of friends will believe that day.

Um, I think it would be a better waste of time to eat bon-bons and watch soap operas all day.


5) Everybody lies on Facebook

If you are divorced, you are "suddenly single!"
If you are out of work, you are "starting your own business!".
If you live at home, you are "homesick and visiting your parents!".
If you are not married, you are "single and loving it!"

Everybody has a great life on Facebook. What a sham.

6) Why would I want to network with my sister, co-workers or customers in the same place?

Facebook is for everyone! Which means my family is on facebook along with one or two of my coworkers, someone from another company I really want to work for, a few of my customers, ten losers from my high school, a lady from church, the next door neighbor and the guy I play golf with.

Do I really want all of those people to potentially know each other through me? Talk about the walls between your world coming down.

That sounds like the beginning of a nuclear network meltdown. Divorce, shootings, home invasions, ughh.

7) Facebook is full of middle aged people trying to hook up with that guy or girl from high school that for some reason, they think has frozen in time and still looks like they did when they were 17.

Nothing screams loser like that.

Facebook is the MySpace of 2009

Just wait. In a few months you will be getting friend requests from some girl named "Jazmin" and a guy name "Pimp-O-Dellic" neither of whom you know.

Then there will be sparkly, bling a bling wallpapers for Facebook.

Finally, the last straw will be when ten people named Odinga from Nigeria want to friend you and tell you about the $10M you have in their bank that they need your help getting out of the country.

9) Your Facebook membership serves only to make the owners rich with your self absorbed content. You get nothing for your work.

There is no revenue share for your content, your life, your posts. They put ads on your profile and bank the payback. You get nada, loser.
There is no linkback, SEO benefit, no way to build something better and money making outside of Facebook.
Nobody is going to hire someone from Facebook. "Hey check out my wall. I need a job, man".
Try LinkedIn, The Ladders, heck Monster. At least that is where employers might look.

10) 10 years from now, you will be embarrassed about all the stuff you put on Facebook.

But because it is the internet, it will be there forever..

You can throw the diary away from grade school.

You can burn your yearbooks.

You can pretend you never dated that guy with the Camaro your junior year.

Facebook lives forever. With all of your Wall posts, friends, everything.

Now you understand why Facebook is for losers?

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what do you end up with at the end of the day spent on facebook? knowledge. that...
Today I have been sent five drinks, a glitterball and a kitten. I discovered that my friend Anna has been shopping and bought seven tops, Stephen is frustrated with London's buses and Stella has become a blood donor. I know that Emma's joined a book club and Alastair had microwave risotto for lunch.

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the centre for research on globalisation says:
facebook is a CIA conspiracy.
Facebook has 20 million users worldwide, is worth billions of dollars and, if internet sources are to be believed, was started by the CIA.

The social networking phenomenon started as a way of American college students to keep in touch. It is rapidly catching up with MySpace, and has left others like Bebo in its wake.

But there is a dark side to the success story that's been spreading across the blogosphere. A complex but riveting Big Brother-type conspiracy theory which links Facebook to the CIA and the US Department of Defence.

The CIA is, though, using a Facebook group to recruit staff for its very sexy sounding National Clandestine Service.

Checking out the job ads
does require a Facebook login, so if you haven't joined the site - or are worried that CIA spooks will start following you home from work -check them out on the agency's own site.

The story starts once Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg had launched, after the dorm room drama that's led to the current court case.

Facebook's first round of venture capital funding ($US500,000) came from former Paypal CEO Peter Thiel. Author of anti-multicultural tome 'The Diversity Myth', he is also on the board of radical conservative group VanguardPAC.

The second round of funding into Facebook ($US12.7 million) came from venture capital firm Accel Partners. Its manager James Breyer was formerly chairman of the National Venture Capital Association, and served on the board with Gilman Louie, CEO of In-Q-Tel, a venture capital firm established by the Central Intelligence Agency in 1999. One of the company's key areas of expertise are in "data mining technologies".

Breyer also served on the board of R&D firm BBN Technologies, which was one of those companies responsible for the rise of the internet.

Dr Anita Jones joined the firm, which included Gilman Louie. She had also served on the In-Q-Tel's board, and had been director of Defence Research and Engineering for the US Department of Defence.

She was also an adviser to the Secretary of Defence and overseeing the Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency (DARPA), which is responsible for high-tech, high-end development.

It was when a journalist lifted the lid on the DARPA's Information Awareness Office that the public began to show concern at its information mining projects.

Wikipedia's IAO page says: "the IAO has the stated mission to gather as much information as possible about everyone, in a centralised location, for easy perusal by the United States government, including (though not limited to) internet activity, credit card purchase histories, airline ticket purchases, car rentals, medical records, educational transcripts, driver's licenses, utility bills, tax returns, and any other available data.".

Not surprisingly, the backlash from civil libertarians led to a Congressional investigation into DARPA's activity, the Information Awareness Office lost its funding.

Now the internet conspiracy theorists are citing Facebook as the IAO's new mask.

Parts of the IAO's technology round-up included 'human network analysis and behaviour model building engines', which Facebook's massive volume of neatly-targeted data gathering allows for.

Facebook's own Terms of use state: "by posting Member Content to any part of the Web site, you automatically grant, and you represent and warrant that you have the right to grant, to facebook an irrevocable, perpetual, non-exclusive, transferable, fully paid, worldwide license to use, copy, perform, display, reformat, translate, excerpt and distribute such information and content and to prepare derivative works of, or incorpoate into other works, such information and content, and to grant and authorise sublicenses of the foregoing.

And in its equally interesting privacy policy: "Facebook may also collect information about you from other sources, such as newspapers, blogs, instant messaging services, and other users of the Facebook service through the operation of the service (eg. photo tags) in order to provide you with more useful information and a more personalised experience. By using Facebook, you are consenting to have your personal data transferred to and processed in the United States."

Is the CIA really providing the impetus and the funding behind the monster growth of this year's biggest dot com success story? Maybe only the men with the nice suits and ear pieces can answer that.

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and as somoeone argues, facebook is the end of humanity:
There, I said it, now we have to live with it.

For those of you who know me, you know that I am a man of my word. I am not a good person, but I am honest and virtuous. Maybe, kinda and sorta don’t exist in my vocabulary, and that’s sorta one of my best features. Maybe it’s why I’m kinda the best at what I do? Entirely possible.

Sometimes it takes a real man to listen to someone’s pain. I get to do it on a daily basis, oftentimes not by my own admission. Today’s life-threatening terrorist force comes not from the Middle East, but from your very own computer screen. It’s called Facebook, and it’s going to ruin your life – if it hasn’t already.

facebook
The beginning of the end…

I’ll explain how Facebook works in the most honest terms you’ll come across:

-You sign up for an account. You put in some bullshit quotes and little blurbs about yourself, like you were making a singles ad. You are in a way, because you’re about to whore yourself out to the lowest bidder.

-You include pictures of yourself. You only pick the “best” ones. You also include every single picture you’ve ever appeared in, just to show strangers how outgoing you are. Girls will show off their body and clothes, and guys will show off their cars and the girls who just made a profile. They know you. They went to school with you. They own the right to be in the same picture as you, because they are popular.

-You include every aspect of your personal and professional life on the profile. Your schools, where you work, your relatives, address, phone number – anything you would be terrified of if someone got a hold of. Don’t be afraid though, this is the Internet! No bad people on the Internet to abuse the system, ever.

-You start looking up your friends. You know, those people who sometimes call your name if you’re in viewing range. Once you see their Facebook profile, you add their friends, because shit – you’re FRIENDS too.

-You look up the definition of the word ‘friend’ and realize you are so very fucking wrong

-You start to join the ‘clubs’ or groups of people with similar interests. No need to look hard though, there’s a group for everything. You can even make your own. You are now “An employee of Dunder-Mifflin!” but what about the other 37 groups with the same name? Dunder-Mifflin must have a lot of branches, then. +1 to originality.

-You friend writes on your “wall.” They say something meaningful like “OMG I haven’t seen you in ages! We gotta hang out soon!” Weird, eh? Last time I checked I hung out with my friends all the time. In fact, we were having so much fun hanging out that we forgot to not see each other in ages.

-This little light bulb goes off in your head about every person you’ve ever met. Is my ex-boyfriend on Facebook? How about that boy that sexually assaulted me? How about my abusive uncle? Wow, they’re all here! I can’t wait for them to know my every waking moment thanks to my friends writing on my wall about every breath I take.

-You start adding everyone, ever. You try to complete your entire high school by clicking every fucking piece of blue text imaginable. You feel so liberated when that bully that beat you up apologizes 9 years too late. It’s so easy to apologize over the Internet than it is to be a real person and do it in person with some heart and soul.

-You begin to electronically stalk your friends and people you hate. You can’t stop checking their profile on a daily basis. You start to feel nauseous when you’re waiting for their weekend pictures to be posted on Monday. You get butterflies when you start to see their innermost personal life displayed for all to see. You don’t notice you’re a victim too, since there’s no way to track who’s looking at yours.

-You can’t sleep at night until you check every profile ever. You start to get a slight buzz when you find out that your worst enemy hurt themselves while on vacation. You get chills down your spine when you hear the pity in their writing and you like it.

-You start to use Facebook wall writing as a substitute for MSN Messenger and email. You write very personal plans and thoughts to your ‘friends.’ Funny, if you wrote any of that stuff in an email and someone read it, you’d be mortified and feel violated. You equate wall writing to leaving “voicemail”. Since everyone else is addicted to Facebook, of course they’re going to see it in minutes.

-You don’t remember the last time you spoke to a friend on the phone. Why bother? Facebook is 24/7 free and no long distance. Voice? What’s that? You can hear their voice in their pictures of them holding their drinks. You can, can’t you…?

-You start using Facebook as a filtering service for your entire life. You start to judge people’s worth based on their profile. How many books they have read? What do they listen to? Is their life quote deep or just funny? Does it change every day? Oh my god, this person likes dogs too! Must be a great person…!

-You start to wonder who’s watching your profile. You make changes to your profile to appeal to everyone alive. You become a generic version of yourself. You’re afraid to express yourself because maybe…JUST maybe the love of your life will hate you because you don’t like dogs. You now love dogs. You love everything. Everything you hate is now “all right!” and everything you love is now “cool.” Spread yourself thin, because that’s the way to bring people closer to you.

-You notice that Cindy has 137 friends. You’re a few short of that number, so you start adding your cousin’s school friends. Seems logical, seeing as you’re both alive and on the same planet

-You run into someone you Facebook with in real life. They start to tell you about their life and events, but you already know everything. Who needs human contact and conversation anyway? Seems useless, you can barely listen to mp3s while talking at a bar. That Gwen Stefani’s not gonna listen to itself, you know. This person you barely know is now congratulating you on your new job. Seems totally appropriate, seeing as they don’t know what fucking colour your eyes are, or, you know, anything else.

-You read something on some website that says that if you spent as much time on Wikipedia as you did on Facebook, you’d be one of the most knowledgeable people alive and actually contribute to society

-Your attraction to the opposite sex quadruples. Guys that have no balls or personal skills are now chatting you up on Facebook. They’ve seen you drunk in pictures and now they want to be beside you. You love the attention and check your profile every chance you get. You have just found the ultimate dating service – the kind that violates every privacy act and human rights issue known to man.

-You don’t remember that last time you used MSN Messenger thanks to Facebook. You always login on invisible mode, so you don’t have to talk to anyone. You decided that MSN is just a great address book for people you hate. You read somewhere that you should delete people you don’t talk to, but then the list would be 4 people long! The horror! There’s no need to address your insecurities about your social life, really.

-You start to believe your own Facebook profile. You become more fake and more ‘fake outgoing.’ You change your little status message to alert everyone about your Cuba vacation and any every fucking minutia imaginable. The best part is that since anyone can read this, thieves know what you’re up to and break into your house without incident. The insurance company laughs at you and calls you an idiot. I am not far behind.

-You die, finally. No one notices because you weren’t there to post that as your status message. The end.

I hope you’re beginning to see the light. This is your life, and it’s ending one click at a time. Facebook brings out the worst in people. You put so much time and energy into something that makes you a worse person. Do you WANT this? I’m surprised you’ve made it this far into the article without changing tabs to check if someone wrote on your wall… I no longer have a Facebook account. Mine lasted all of 12 hours before I came to my fucking senses. People kept adding me, writing messages, asking me computer questions, flirting…go away. I don’t know you, and I don’t want to. You didn’t talk to me years ago, you have no right to talk to me now. I will not make an account. Your pretty little ‘school collection’ will never be complete without me. You will not be my buddy, and I will not ask your girlfriend about her new job. You won’t see me there, period. I am a popular dude on the Internet, but my private life is just that. You will not know things about me, and that’s how I like it. Privacy is the ultimate freedom that we are granted in life, and you fools are giving it away.

[DesignBoyz]

redpaw, can you tell us what are Facebook's peak hours in India?