desicreative.com

Here is a link to my portfolio. I graduated 2 months ago. Nobody wants to hire me yet. So sad I'm slowly becoming poor. Any tips on making my work better? I need a job soon, oh and Portfolio.com only lets you put up 5 pieces. I have 15 in my real book.

http://www.portfolios.com/CreativeCreations

Thanks,
Matthew Peters

i am adding some of the work rigtht here

well fancy that, the internets are amazing.

throw this portfolio away and start again. no offense. here's a second piece of advice: compare what's in your book to work in archive mag or a one show annual. you are competing with people who are in these publications.

as a writer, you have to write sick sick headlines or copy. all the writing in your book is weak. also, i've seen writers who are straight out of school who not only write better than you but whose art direction makes yours look like you crafted it with elmer's glue and cottonballs.

this is my honest opinion. if you think this is harsh, do not even consider stepping foot into a reputable portfolio review event or putting it in front of any respectable creative director. you will get swallowed or even worse, ignored.

cheers and good luck to you. i hope this helps. again, i mean no disrespect.

the one I kinda like is the art school. it's far from perfect or great, more like OK. brokeback is a piece without an idea (why the heck did you choose brokeback mountain and not some other film is beyond me), blood cells is something I didn't understand (might be because I'm not a native eng speaker) and iPhone it's not enough to steal a line from a movie and put it on a product. especially, if the product is about something completely different.

it's probably not worse than my first things, though

my advice> look at the annuals (heck, just go to adsoftheworld.com adarena.blogspot.com or adofthemonth.com). look around. look again. ask yourself why you like something and why you don't like something else. find out how good ads work and what it means for an idea to be good or great. then work, work, work on your new pieces. with your track record (highschool dropout et ali), you've gotta have the talent needed!

good luck

Well tough room eh?
All that work is on par with most things out there right now. Creative and interesting.

Bolthouse Juice may not be on the market in your neck of the woods. The brand is very health focused and the actual product is an immunity support drink. Thus a white blood cell would like it if you drank it. A few other lines are rolling around in my head but I like that one. It fits for the brand and will be page one of my book.

Brokeback Mountian. My college has a large gay community and the theme of the casino event was western. This hit the target demo as well as played off pop culture of the day. The theme was also a major tie-in. I admit its not my best work but I'm not an art director. I'm working with a director now to turn my better ideas into visuals.

I will not throw away my book and start all over. My work is solid, my ideas are creative. All I lack is polish, there is more to writing than the words on the paper.

A year ago i had a book of 15 ads all simply written words on paper. A book of words. I was given good reviews and job offers simply based on writing. I've since taken that book thrown out a good deal of those and reworked everything. If you don't like my work thats fine. If you fancy yourself a writer you need to learn how to get your point across a little better Cozznriots.

I wish you luck and I would love to see your work, I'm sure it is fantastic.

Cheers to all.

hey mistergreen,

i think u should be open to advice since u asked for it. honestly the trend these days is for people and Creative Directors to look at clean fresh layouts that are idea driven. Unfortunately yours do not have it. But it is not very difficult to have an impressive portfolio. Divide your book into 5 visual based ideas and 5 copy based. Visual based maynot be hard to do if you get visuals from getty images, tony stone etc. But keep an open mind, as dwin said check out these sites, adsoftheworld, adofdamonth, creativecriminal.blogspot.com, etc etc.

The other way is to just keep on bugging CDs, ask for 3 months free internship, i am sure someone will take you, and in this time period u can impress them and get the job.

i second cozznriots and the other chap. u've gotta be ready to take criticism well. thats the first step to learning. most copywriters have bloated egos for nothing. they don't understand that being cool and listening to hippie music is not the only job of writers. it's about feeding your mind and then expressing it eloquently. wid an attitude problem in the first place, u start wid a handicap.

just shake it loose dude. ur ads are at best amateur. i have only one advice for you: read "hey whipple squeeze this" by luke sullivan

life as a writer is a long struggle, hope u make it. seriously.

mistergreen83, you must have done more work than this. can we see of of your other stuff. please dont take the criticism too badly. people are just taking time out to tell you what they think may be good for you.

Hi Matt
I like that over confidence...it's needed. To last out a lifetime of listening to acid remarks. And improving yourself. Instead of wilting away. Funnily enough, my take from the health food ad is that it makes you look so rosy (as in 'the pink of health') and therefore bursting with RBCs. I never contemplated that WBCs would love to gulp it, 'cos they increase during an infection (and no one wants that!). So there's an insight from a consumer...However that helps.

I like your take omitnot.
Mistergreen, keep up the work. People will say all kindsof things.

bizarre conversations.

good advice... start over or pick another career.

also decide if you want to a.d. or c.w.

your art direction needs some help big time too. wow.

your book's response says alot more than anyone here can.

cut your losses now & get busy IF you want a ad gig.

& hey... it's a tough world out there filled w/ some GREAT books.

(good is the enemy of great).

best to you.